Poltergeist Microwave

Sound asleep, no one else in the house but Neil and I, when a jolt of electromagnetic waves wake us up. A whir and bright light and I look to my right and see Neil still in bed and he looks to his left and sees me still in bed so the mystery is, how in the hell did the microwave turn on and start cooking?

I doubt either one of us had sleptwalk because if we had, you can be sure there would a least be some food in the microwave but it was empty and counting down from 3-plus minutes.

This is not the first time our microwave has acted up. A week ago, it began to beep every minute or so until we unplugged it. But nothing was creepier than last night.

I'm hoping our poltergeist will at least throw some snacks in the microwave the next time. Or maybe our poltergeist will pack our lunches for work. Just a few small requests. Afterall, it's not paying us any rent.